graciousness and gratitude -- how do you score?

These two people are hard to find in the world. Which two? 
The one who is first to do a kindness, and
The one who is grateful and thankful for any kindness done.
Anguttara Nikāya 2.118

I think Graciousness is undervalued in life. I think Graciousness at work, at home and at play could make everything more sustainable, and more fun. If you can remain gracious, if you can respond graciously, you keep an open mind. You look at something you might reject easily for longer and in doing so have the open mind that perhaps you might have missed something. Because you are gracious you can hold on to what has been offered and explore it for usefulness and then from a position of exploration rather than arrogant prejudice decide how much to keep and how much to reject. Being Gracious does not subject you to accepting things or situations you don't want, like or believe in It gives you space to decide how or if to make best use of them

You accept the intention of the other - who or what ever other that might be - in giving you a gift that perhaps in the end you don't want but still honour that it was given to you anyway. Which in turn sets up more opportunity for unexpected gifts to decide about.

Gratitude runs on from this. If you are able to be gracious in the moment, perhaps you can have gratitide for the unexpected and unplanned things that come your way, look back and see how this has affected you life. And so sustain the ability to remain open to new information, new objections, new intentions, new situations, new people.

I am ranting a little in writing this here.. But I am not forcing you to read it. That would be ungracious.

I like Mr Jagger in his sentiment and ( slightly misused words) You won't always get what you thought you wanted, but you might just get what you need.



I need to hang on to this thought though, as fiercely in debate I can forget it. I am not a Buddhist either, but loved the quote.